The Opposite Of Brown Nosing
by andreainwonderland
Summary: One-shot, Xigbar centric. Let's just say Xigbar's a tad bitter about being replaced by someone who hasn't lived enough of Nothing yet.


**Author's Notes**: Because I am in dire need to write a little drabblething to cure this writer's block. And because I hearttt Xigbar to the max. Oh yeah, and because it's four in the morning & I can't sleep. Woohoo, experimentation with first-person view. & in "surfer dude" language too, which just makes it all the more fun. Reviews are wickeddd appreciated, just let me know if I freaking characterized this damn thing the right way or if I just screwed Xigbar over.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything, which is a shame just because Xigbar's lines are too cool.

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Sure, even though I held the spot of Number II doesn't mean I'm still with it. As if. Just because I don't fawn over Xemnas and the ground he walks on day and night doesn't mean that I'm not important. Hell, I was the one sent to talk to Sora way back in Hollow Bastion, but do you think that matters to anyone else now? Nope. It doesn't. But I'm not bitter, not one bit.

Well, maybe a little.

But hell, you would be too if you lost your heart one day, woke up with only faint memories of your life and felt as empty as a drained glass of vodka. No feelings, no heart, nothing at all. Nothing in the true sense and feel and of being nothing.

**Nobody**. Nothing. _The non-existant ones_.

Not that it's stopping me from having my fun. I still get a kick out of walking around on thin air itself and scaring the daylights out of my fellow cohorts. Especially Saix. How I love to make that suck up cringe. Almost makes me feel like I have a heart to really laugh with. And even if I can't feel it, I still remember the satisfaction I get from taunting the little ones. Making them all squirm. Those losers think they can take me for granted, they are so wrong. Because I'm the true second-in-command. I was one of Ansem the Wise's appretices. And I was there when the six of us became Nonexistant. Too bad Xemnas doesn't remember shit about that. And since I am no suck-up, that ranks me down with the likes of the little ones. The "young" ones.

Oh sure, I'm liked enough. I've been a good boy, I've done my fair share of bullshit missions to gain the "Superior's" respect. But oh how the tides have turned on me. Now I'm more like third in command, what with Saix and everything.

Man, I'm sad that the little Keyblade brat hasn't finished him off yet. That's a day I look forward to laughing at. And I'm sure that the position of second-in-command still tastes and sweet and satisfying as it did in the old days. Well, as satisfying as something can be when you don't actually have a heart to feel with. Xemnas, Xaldin, Vexen, Lexaeus, Zexion, and me. The original six. Because Xemnas really cares about who was actually there for all the shit. _As if_. Too bad none of the others want to admit that. They're too busy with their missions, their brown-nosing, their mindless following to care when I rant about it. Man, if only they'd realize that we're pretty much being cheated out of a golden opportunity.

Whatever. Three of us originals are gone anyways. Maybe it just proves we are the weakest ones, destined to fall back in order until we finally reach rock bottom. Or die ourselves. Whatever comes first I guess. But hey, that could be stopped. At least in my mind.

That Sora kid gets in the way a hell of a lot. Finishing off the originals, I'll have to get him back for that. The keyblade brat just further proves that Saix, the winner of the brown-nosing competition, maybe is better suited for the second-in-command job slot than the rest of us. Whatever. More power to him and all the times that he's screwed the Superior. Hell yes I want Kingdom Hearts. Hell yes I want my heart back. And hell yes, do I want Xemnas to remember who stuck by him before he discarded the name "Xehanort" and led us all into the spiral of Nonexistance. And poor little Saix will weep when that day comes, finally realizing that his days at the top are over. He's over and done. And then who'll be the second-in-freaking-command? _I will_.

For me, it's not just about getting my heart back. It's about getting my _respect_ back.


End file.
